CMS Phone Readiness Suite · Step 3 of 3

The Family Phone Agreement

This is not a legal document. It is a relational one. Read it together, agree to it together, sign it together. Return to it when the phone puts the relationship under pressure — which it will.

Read aloud to each other before you sign.

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This agreement begins from a place of trust and respect. The parent in this agreement trusts their child enough to give them this responsibility. The child in this agreement respects that trust enough to take it seriously.

This phone is not a right. It is an invitation to a new level of responsibility. And with every real responsibility comes a real agreement about how it is carried.

We are signing this not because we do not trust each other — but because making our expectations explicit, from the beginning, protects the relationship when things get hard. And things will get hard. This agreement tells us both what to do when they do.

What I, the child, commit to

Tick in navy blue

✓
I will use this phone as a tool for communication, learning, and connection — not as a way to avoid boredom, loneliness, or difficult feelings.
✓
I will not use my phone in my bedroom after the agreed time each night. It will charge in the family charging space.
✓
I will be at the dinner table — and in family spaces — without my phone, and without needing to be asked.
✓
I will not share personal information, photographs, or my location with anyone my parent has not met or approved.
✓
I will tell my parent if something happens on my phone that confuses me, upsets me, or makes me feel unsafe. Even if it is embarrassing. Even if I did something I should not have done. I will tell them.
✓
I will respond to my parent's messages within a reasonable time when I am not in school or asleep.
✓
I will not use my phone to be unkind — not to anyone, not in any way.
✓
I understand that my parent may occasionally ask to see my phone. I will not hide things that I would be ashamed to show them.
✓
If I break this agreement, I will tell my parent rather than waiting to be found out. Coming forward is always better than being caught.

What I, the parent, commit to

Tick in burnt orange

✓
I will model the same relationship with my own phone that I am asking of you.
✓
I will not take the phone away permanently as a first response to a mistake. The consequence will fit the breach — not the frustration of the moment.
✓
I will be a safe person to come to. If you tell me something difficult, I will respond with curiosity before I respond with consequence.
✓
I will not monitor your phone secretly. If I need to check it, I will tell you I am doing so and why.
✓
I will give you information, not just rules. I will explain what I am concerned about and why — not simply say no without reason.
✓
I will review this agreement with you. It is not set in stone — it will grow as you grow, and as trust is built.
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I will acknowledge when I get this wrong. Parenting a phone-age child is new territory for all of us.
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I will remember that the goal of this agreement is not control. It is a good relationship, with this phone as part of it.

What we both commit to

Tick in green

✓
We will return to this agreement when something is not working — not as an accusation, but as a reference point we both agreed to.
✓
We will keep phone-free time together without either of us reaching for a device.
✓
We will talk about what we see online — the good things and the worrying things — without judgment about what the other finds interesting.
✓
We will review this agreement together in three months, and adjust anything that is not working.
If the Agreement Is Broken

We agree to three graduated responses — each one proportionate to the breach and designed to restore the agreement, not simply punish it.

Breach Level 1 — First significant breach

Breach Level 2 — Second significant breach

Breach Level 3 — Third significant breach

Names

Signatures

Draw here
Draw here

Tick all 21 commitments, enter both names, and draw both signatures to activate.

The phone will test this agreement.
The relationship you have built is what holds.